Still Christmas (can’t quite believe that it hasn’t be been and gone yet.
All ‘the guests’ were collected and installed, the big ones, the little ones and the middle sized ones too.
Mr Dear Husband needed to jet back to Madagascar for a few days, and this little brown duck drove him to the airport. It was snowing… A LOT, more than a little, did you hear me, A LOT. Not getting out of 3rd gear on the AutoBahn is a weird experience. I took one of the guests with me, not sure why, he doesn't speak a word of German, but he is one of those ‘handy’ types, and I figured that having a man with me to dig me out of the snow was a smart move.
All went well until after drop off, there I was leaning into the windshield, like that would make it easier to see through the blanket of white that was being smashed in my face, dodging other Lulu’s that were all doing the same… and it happened. Whoops! I took the wrong Autobahn and got caught up in a mass migration of Lulu’s… all leaning into the windscreen, all hoping that would help… but in TOTALLY the wrong direction.
“Whatever you do, don’t panic!” I started repeating, like a mantra, only it wasn’t putting me into a nice dreamy meditation, more in the direction of manic anxiety…
At about the time that I thought I might need to tell ‘the male guest’ that we were going to need our passports, I found a place to turn around and head in the other direction. I mumbled something like “Did you enjoy the scenic tour? I have been planning that for months!” No way did he buy it, but was quite gracious in his silence. When we finally made it home, I needed a pair of pliers to pull his fingernails out of the dashboard… but I don’t think he ever really noticed his close shave with certain death.
Merry Christmas to one and all… Let’s hope it’s a happy one, without any tears….whoops! I feel a poem coming on… here is something for you all to pop under your tree…from me!:
I've been getting ready for Christmas
I'm revving up for the great day
my credit card's cracked and my freezer is packed
'cause I started my shopping in May
The mistletoe's hanging in bunches
'cause the odd Christmas kiss isn't wrong
and the Vicar I've found - quite likes calling round
and exploring my crowns with his tongue
The bin men have gotten quite friendly
they're after a present I fear
they won't feel so chuffed when I tell them - get stuffed
'cause they don't speak the rest of the year
The family is coming for dinner
last year it was quite a good laugh
we ate fairly late - dished the veg on the plate
found the turkey was still in the bath
The kids are all pink with excitement
'cause Santa will come so they say
their lists are extensive - extremely expensive
and they'll break it all by Boxing day
But it's worth all that fuss Christmas morning
when their little eyes are all aglow
when we're all feeling merry full of goodwill and sherry
and suffering from wind Ho Ho Ho
But please don't forget why we do it
why each year we must go to this fuss
for that guy up above who brought peace and brought love
and who probably owns Toys R Us.......... Liz Garrad